Saturday, 9 July 2016

Three Go Camping

You see this tiny little beagle outside this average sized tent?
She’s small for a beagle, look how she takes up barely any room inside the tent.
Small isn’t she? So after a fun day out at the beach and a fab night out in a dog friendly pub, I didn’t think there would be any problems with our tent accommodating all of us for a cosy night’s sleep.
The illustration shows  two humans in a sleeping bag on an airbed in a tent, adding one small dog in shouldn’t have been a problem…
but then this happened.
For some reason, my little dog, once she was on top of a sleeping bag, grew to the size of a woolly mammoth.
She.was. everywhere. Despite having not one but two of her doggy beds in the tent, Mary decided to plonk herself right in the middle of us and rest her head on my arm. The weight of her forced all of  air out  of the sleeping bag, leaving me pressed up against the zip at the side.
At one stage I tried to give myself a little more room by unzipping the side of the bag, but I had been pressed up against it with such force, that half of me fell out leaving my right side exposed to the elements. So then I turned on my side and tried to zip the sleeping bag back up again. It was something of an exertion, but I managed it, tucked my arms back in and found myself  stuck in the sleeping bag on my side. I learned if I turned very slowly, I could swap between trapped on my side, to trapped on my back to trapped on my otherside.
Each position took about fifteen minutes to get into.  I rotated myself around and around.  For the first time in my life, I knew how it felt to be a lump of doner kebab meat. After several hours of perpetually rotating with Mary’s disapproving stares, I finally got into a semi – comfortable position. I found if I bent arms back, and tucked my knees in and bent at the hips in a 90 degree angle, I reckoned I could get to sleep.
Ahh, the peace and quiet of the countyside, getting back to nature, the great outdoors, I was nodding off … until the noisiest mother effing dawn chorus decided to put a stop to my slumbering. Seriously! What the hell is all that about? Getting up in the morning and squealing and squawking, letting every bastard in the world knowing you are awake. Like, who does that? Fecking birds are noisy buggers. And that was just the normal birds. Then the seagulls started- those lot are  massive knobheads.  It was five o bloody clock in the morning and it went on for AGES.
I didn’t see any point trying to go to sleep after that, so I freed myself from my nylon prison  and made my way to the loo block. I was the tiredest I have ever been in my life and I couldn’t even coordinate my own body properly. My feet were dragging along and I had developed a twitch in my arm. There was a fella just a few steps ahead of me, on his way to the shower block and he  turned round and looked a little startled. It was then I realised I was actually moaning out loud. Not just one moan, but a sequence of moans. First a “auuuurghhh” and then “Emummmm” and then a “psss huuuu huh” gaspy noise. And even though I realised I was doing it, I still couldn’t manage to stop. I was convinced I was going to die of “Tired” and my last words were going to be “Aruuuuooog hummum  pushhhuh”
In the toilet  block, once I had managed to work out which were the shower cubicles and which were the loos and attended to business, I realised my brain had turned into a doner kebab as well because I couldn’t work out where to wash my hands.
This sink had writing on it and I couldn’t fathom out what was going on there. My eyes couldn’t focus on both the writing and the operating of the tap.

Then I found another sink, but I couldn’t use that one because this sink was just for washing babies and I didn’t have babies to wash, only my hands.
I eventually came upon this sink which was just right once I had worked out how the taps worked.
When I got back to the tent, the noisy birds had quietened down a bit and Mary had moved to the bottom of the bed, so I slid back into to my nylon prison encasement, Mary snoring at my feet. She must have sensed I was comfortable at last so she decided to come and lie on top of me. ON TOP OF ME.
And THAT is how to take your dog camping.
The whole thing was a bit of a “life imitating art” scenario as our heroine Fiona in Five Go Glamping finds herself in a similar camping predicament:
“Sometimes in films, you mCPv4xkcWgAAOweNight get a scene where a person is waking up because they’re being nibbled and caressed by the romantic target of their affections. Then you see it’s a weird half-dream – they wake up alone, on their sofa, to find it is not the target of their affections who is nibbling their ear or kissing their neck, but instead it is their dog licking their face furiously, dribbling dog food scented goo all over them.
Well, this is kind of what happened to me.
But, instead of dreaming I was with the love of my life and then waking up with a dog licking my face, my subconscious decided I would dream first about a dog licking my face and then wake up to find a dog licking my face.
I was also dehydrated from one too many alcoholic ginger beers and some questionable parsnip wine and in an allegedly three-man pink polka dot monstrosity of a tent. 
Fun-filled, witty and upliftingFive Go Glamping is a quick read but a memorable one. It features a great combination of friendship, romance and adventure and the story builds up vividly to the extentI felt like I was theremyself, watching the madness unfold.’ – Reviewed the Book
‘Liz Tipping’s writing style was great, it was fun, flirty, great characters and kept me thoroughly entertained with some wonderful witty words and some gorgeous heartwarming moments.’ – Kraftireader
‘Believe me, if you are in a need of a book that’s going to make you laugh out loud, has style, glamour and interesting storyline – than do not look any further! Five Go Glamping is what you’re looking for!’ – On My Bookshelf
‘This is an energetic and lively story, packed full of friendship, romance, mishaps and laughs. I raced through the book and I enjoyed Liz Tipping’s style of writing, which made me want to keep on reading long after I should have been in bed!’ – Curious Ginger Cat Blog
If you love it, pin it!
About these ads
Occasionally, some of your visitors may see an advertisement here
You can hide these ads completely by upgrading to one of our paid plans.

Wednesday, 17 February 2016

The Thank Book For podcast with extra booky links

I had massive fun making a podcast with Thank Book For – you can listen here below` if you haven’t caught it already!

It was so, so  hard choosing my favourite books!
I had to seriously rack my brains to come up with answers to the questions about my favourite books. Here’s a little bit more information about some of  the books I spoke about it.
I picked Rachel’s Holiday by Marian Keyes  as my favourite book of all time. Love this story, such a sobfest and also hilarious!
22729‘How did it end up like this? Twenty-seven, unemployed, mistaken for a drug addict, in a treatment centre in the back arse of nowhere with an empty Valium bottle in my knickers …’ Meet Rachel Walsh. She has a pair of size 8 feet and such a fondness for recreational drugs that her family has forked out the cash for a spell in Cloisters – Dublin’s answer to the Betty Ford Clinic. She’s only agreed to her incarceration because she’s heard that rehab is wall-to-wall jacuzzis, gymnasiums and rock stars going tepid turkey – and it’s about time she had a holiday. But what Rachel doesn’t count on are the toe-curling embarrassments heaped on her by family and group therapy, the dearth of sex, drugs and rock’n’roll – and missing Luke, her ex. What kind of a new start in life is this?
If you haven’t already read it, use the look inside button on amazon to read the first chapter by clicking here.
For my favourite book from  last year, I chose  The Fire Sermon by Francesca Haig. It is AMAZING. It’s set hundred of years after a nuclear blast where every child is born as a twin.
Cass is born9780007563081 a few minutes after her brother, Zach. Both infants are perfect, but only one is a blessing; only one is an Alpha.
The other child must be cast out. But with no discernible difference, other than their genders, their parents cannot tell which baby is tainted.
Perfect twins. So rare, they are almost a myth. But sooner or later the Omega will slip up. It will eventually show its true self. The polluted cannot help themselves.
Then its face can be branded. Then it can be sent away.
You’ll love this book if you love gripping dystopian tales with fantastic characters. Here it is on amazon. There’s also a free sample you can download to your kindle. that’s here.
For my favourite character in a book, I couldn’t pick between Angela Clarke in Lindsey Kelk’s I Heart series or Lola Daley from This Charming Man, so i was greedy and picked them both!
Angela is just so funny and Lola Daley is too. These are exactly  the kind of heroines I love. Click here to meet Lola and here to meet Angela- your new book best friends!
Driving Jarvis Ham by Jim Bob is one of the funniest books I have ever read and is my go to recommendation for peo51PfMX9deQL._SX322_BO1,204,203,200_ple looking for a laugh out loud read. It’s very black comedy, but I found it hilarious and read it in an afternoon, laughing all the way through. Have a look!
“A brilliantly witty story of unconventional, unwavering, and regularly exasperating friendship.
Meet Jarvis Ham: tea-room assistant, diarist, lift-cadger, Princess Di fan, secret alcoholic, and relentless seeker of fame. Jarvis may be an all-round irritant, but he’s harmless, and deep down, you know, he’s got a heart of gold. Hasn’t he?”
It has illustrations in it and it’s only £1.99 at the moment too . Have a look by clicking here 

I also spoke in the podcast about film adaptations. Have you read Cloud Atlas by David Mitchell? I loved the book and the film but I was slightly disappointed with parts of the film as the character I cloud-atlas-cover-imageloved most, Frobisher , wasn’t as wonderful in the film as I imagined him to be.  I originally  read Cloud Atlas as the science fiction elements appealed to me most, but I found myself enjoying the historical sequences much more. Frobisher was my absolute favourite. There’s a moment in the book where he winks at another character and it’s sadly missing form the film which is a shame as it’s a perfect moment. The beginning is a bit weird, but try and get through the first few pages and it all changes. It’s worth it, I promise.   It’s available on amazon here.
Another book I mention is the brilliantly funny Turning Forty by Mike Gayle
High flier Matt Beckford’s sole ambition is to turn forty with his life sorted. And with a Porsche on the drive and a job that requires him to spend more time in BA’s club lounge than his own lounge, it looks like things are going in the right direction. But when Matt’s wife unexpectedly calls time on their marriage, a chain of events is set in motion that very quickly sees him facing forty broke, homeless and completely alone.
Here’s the link! Mike Gayle – Turning Forty

My “guilty pleasure” (even though I can’t stand that term as i explain in the podcast!)  is reading celebrity aut41oAiZRtI0L._SX324_BO1,204,203,200_obiographies and  the reason I like to read them is because you already know the main character and don’t have to waste any time getting to know them. I particularly enjoyed Joey Essex’s book Being Reem. It’s a wonderfully and uplifting book. it’s heartbreaking at times as Joey  tells how his mother committed suicide when he was young, but it’s such joyous book as it shows what joey has achieved. he is so daft and has some bonkers ideas. It’s a lovely read and I highly recommend it.
See for yourself by clicking here! It’s only 99p at the moment as well!

And finally, I mentioned my own book, Five Go Glamping!
 A four day break from her hectic life to relax in the countryside and hang out at a local festival is just what Fiona Delaney needs.Until suddenly glamping starts to feel a lot more like camping and Fiona’s in desperate search of a comfy chair, wi-fi and a chilled glass of wine. But when she finally makes it to the local pub she discovers this trip could be more than just a holiday, it might just change her life forever…

It’s available in all these places, just click on the retailer links below!

im_buy-amazon im_buy-ibooks im_buy-google
im_buy-kobo im_buy-nook im_buy-ebooks
So what would you pick for your favourite books? Who are your favourite characters? Any favourite film adptations? Tell me in the comments!

Sunday, 14 February 2016

Mary goes to the museum

Mary's been with us four months now. We took her to the Avoncroft Museum of Historic Buildings this afternoon. I knew they allowed dogs, but was pleasantly surprised to find they also allowed them in the historic  buildings, so Mary was able to have a good sniff around while we were looking inside. The staff made quite a fuss of her and a small child in the gift shop  said "No, do not eat me, doggy!" It was a really fun hour or two out and cost £7 per adult for admission.
Mary eyeing up a barrel of perry cider
Some time travellers had also decided to visit the museum that day
Worked out where the time travellers had come from- out of this Tardis
It wasn't an actual tardis, it was part of  the National telephone kiosk collection, housed at the museum
Some old things- because that's what's museums are for.
Another time traveller who came out of the Tardis
Me and Mary consider whether we would like to go glamping in a Shepherd Hut
We may prefer glamping in a traditional gypsy caravan
Mary inspecting one of the buildings to make sure it meets with her doggy approval
Mary spotted some sheep and decided to bark at them
The windmill - most impressive!
Find out more about the museum here

Friday, 25 September 2015

The amazing Five Go Glamping Thunderclap

The thunderclap was such fun with loads and loads of people taking part!
So here's a big thank you from me for taking part!

Here's some of the tweets that were shared!

Saturday, 19 September 2015

World Record Attempt- Can you help?

I'm not really going to attempt a world record challenge as such, but I will be trying to do the modern day equivalent and I'm going to attempt to make "Five Go Glamping" or #FiveGoGlamping to trend on twitter next Friday.

I'm using thunderclap to help me! You can help too by clicking on join the thunderclap below.
If I am successful by getting 100 people to join up and support, thunderclap will release 100 messages about Five Go Glamping onto twitter on Friday afternoon at 1pm which will create a real splash.
I'd love if you could help! So come and join the party and Join The Thunderclap!

Wednesday, 9 September 2015

Dogs on holiday

Now, where were we? That's right, we'd been glamping. I realise I haven't blogged about the night after glamping where we went to Weston Super Mare.
I will blog about that soon because I have to tell you about the OAP coach trip outing and the hen party in the hotel. And the scary lift. And I totally will do that- but first I must show you this!
We went to Ireland and here are some of the dogs I met:

There was this dog

And this dog- this dog looks quite posh I think.

And the posh dog had a friend who didn't trust anybody. 

 This dog was doing his own thing

Then there was this dog who was  THE BEST DOG OF HOLIDAY because he is a Standing Up In The Sea Dog and he has a best friend who was also a dog

Then there was this cat who wasn't a dog but thought he lived in the hotel because he was too ridiculous

And finally there was this squirrel who wasn't a dog and wasn't alive and lived in the shop where you buy typewriters and posters of Our Lady appearing to people and other stuff like plates and a weird jug. No, I don't know either. I have not a bloody clue 

And that is all the dogs I saw on holiday. Thank you. 

Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...